The cartoonist who got it right: Scott Adams’ 87-word financial masterclass remains the best investment advice ever written
Scott Adams, the creator of the Dilbert comic strip, passed away a few days ago at 68 after battling cancer. For most people, he was the man who made cubicle life funny, who turned the pointy-haired boss into a universal symbol of corporate absurdity. But for me, discovering–and first writing about–Adams in 2013 was a revelation of an entirely different kind.That year, while researching something else entirely, I stumbled upon what Adams called his “book” on financial planning, titled “Everything You Need to Know About Financial Planning”. The book was 87 words long. That’s words, not pages. Here it is: Make a will. Pay off your credit cards. Get term life insurance if you have a family to support. Fund your retirement accounts to the maximum. Buy a house if you want to live in one and can afford it. Put six months’ expenses in a money market fund. Take whatever money is left over and invest 70 per cent in a stock index fund and 30 per cent in a bond fund through any discount broker and never touch it until retirement.
That was it. The entire book. And yet, in those 87 words, Adams had captured everything that matters about personal finance. I remember being both surprised and elated. Here was someone I had thought of as merely a witty cartoonist who had somehow arrived at the same conclusions about money that I had spent years trying to communicate to readers. It was validation of a powerful kind: that if you simply think things through clearly, without the noise of the financial services industry clouding your judgment, you arrive at remarkably simple answers.Adams had the credentials, of course. His bachelor’s degree was in economics, he had an MBA, and he’d worked in a bank for years. But as he explained, when he started to write a proper book on personal finance, the more he thought through the contents and simplified them to their logical end, the less remained. What survived was just these few sentences.This is the essence of good financial thinking. The investment industry thrives on complexity because complexity justifies fees, commissions, and the existence of entire armies of advisors. Adams cut through all of it with the clarity that comes from having no commercial interest in complicating things.His Dilbert strips often satirised this very tendency. In one memorable strip, the evil Dogbert explains his plan to launch a mutual fund: “We’ll start ten mutual funds, each with randomly-chosen stocks. Later, we’ll build our advertisements around whichever one does the best purely by chance. My goal is to be the premier provider of imaginary expertise.” I’m certain that some mutual fund executives, reading that strip over their morning tea, must have experienced an uncomfortable moment of self-recognition.After Adams’ death, I came across a quote of his that I hadn’t seen before: “I have poor art skills, mediocre business skills, good but not great writing talent, and an early knowledge of the Internet. And I have a good but not great sense of humour. I’m like one big mediocre soup. None of my skills are world-class, but when my mediocre skills are combined, they become a powerful market force.”This insight applies beautifully to investing as well. You don’t need world-class analytical skills, insider information, or the ability to predict markets. What you need is a combination of ordinary capabilities: the discipline to save regularly, the patience to stay invested, the common sense to avoid complexity, and the humility to acknowledge that you don’t need to be clever. Combined, these mediocre skills create a powerful wealth-building force.Adams showed that the most useful insights often come from people who aren’t trying to sell you anything. His 87 words remain the best investment advice I have ever read, not despite their brevity, but because of it. In a world drowning in financial content, he proved that what matters can fit on a postcard.(Dhirendra Kumar is Founder and CEO of Value Research)(Disclaimer: Recommendations and views on the stock market, other asset classes or personal finance management tips given by experts are their own. These opinions do not represent the views of The Times of India)
